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11:22 a.m. | Wednesday, Feb. 19, 2003
fading away to where Last night I felt myself fading away. The home health aid was talking to me, asking me something and all of a sudden I felt like I was turning invisible. I felt like my voice was fading out and that my body was becoming transparent. I don't know why, it only lasted a little while and then it was gone. My mom is very pissed off lately. She doesn't like when home health aids forget any little thing and can rant about it for a long time. Today I asked to sleep in and she got mad and said don't ask me that it's too much work. I think maybe she is starting to resent having to do things for me and having to be around so much. She doesn't take her meds anymore nor will she agree to see anyone. I saw a flyer at the hospital for a caregiver support group that I�m going to mention to her but I doubt she'll want to go. I think she needs someone to talk to but she thinks that talking doesn't help. I can't help her; I�m the one causing the situation she hates. It makes me feel guilty and resentful back. I�m not stupid I can see what her emotions are and where they come from. Ha, maybe we should have joint therapy. She might come to my shrink if I said the shrink wanted her there. Maybe I�ll bring that up at my next appointment. Of course the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you - if you don't play, you can't win. Finance is the art of passing money from hand to hand until it finally disappears.
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This is my blogchalk:
Canada, Saskatchewan, Saskatoon, , English, , Female, 26-30, Reading.